Hello,
These are the facts...
I have an 18 month old boy with an Australian citizen who lives here with me on a visa. Shes due to sit her Leave to Remain exam in January I believe.
We did not marry. We have lived together for 6 years.
I personally own the house (she has no financial interest) and I have 100% share ownership of a company with nearly all its assets (including cash) now in property or stock for sale.
My partner is a stay at home mother who is self employed and invoices my company £1k per month to cover some bills and other living expenses. Effectively she earns just over £12,570 with some other small jobs from else where.
I pay myself £9096 per year with the remiainder of my income to £50k made up of Dividends. The Mortgage is £1100 p/m
I legally own her car and my only personal asset is a very expensive boat...
It looks like I cant save this relationship, I have re-reprioritised and become better at supporting her but she is unwilling for us both to learn to be better at communicating and feels detached from me now, no matter how hard I try to meet her needs. I am struggling to cope with her mood swings and the way she talks to me.
I have a dreadful feeling Im going to lose my house or lose my son to Australia. This is very daunting and either way will break my heart.
As far as I can see its a lose lose situation with the son being the biggest loser.
She is a very good mother for sure.
I dont think she can afford to stay in the house by herself with our son without me being destitute and unable to afford a place to live in suitable to house a child when I might have him. I dont know how much Im likely to have to pay, but this is a gut feeling.
If she cant afford to live in the house, then she will move back to Australia which would be the worst situation.
My proffesional life is relaxed on timing to a certain degreee and in 2.5 years I should be retired on the back of the income of the property.
I guess my questions are :
How much would I be expected to pay in maintenance on top of the mortgage ? or rather whats the likely scope of my liability so I can access how or IF I can live somewhere else ?
What happens if she just up and leaves the UK with our son and I find out in retrospect ?
how can I stop her from leaving the UK if I think this is going to happen ?
If they arrive in Austraila, how do I get to see him ?
What happens to the house until he is 18 ? If she decides to make a go of it in the UK and she cant afford its upkeep and repairs she might be forced into letting rooms out in a house Im paying for (or worse)?
Is there anything I havent throught about ?
If you have any legal guidance or advice I would be grateful. I would like to know the extent of this problem on all levels. No mincing of words...
Clearly I need to take this to counciling first to make sure its done, then to mediation to try to work out a compromise.
My appreciation in advance.
M
You can apply for a Prohibited Steps Order on form C100 to stop her from taking your child out of the country. You can find the form on the www.gov.uk website. There will be a fee for the application. However, perhaps you could consider mediation first? Find a registered mediator from the Family Mediation Council. There will be a fee. You can also find guidance on the advicenow.org.uk website about finances when separating which may give you an idea of how much you will have to pay.
Hello Champagne,
Many thanks for your helpful response. I did not know and had not found out about the Prohibited Steps order.
Agreed, Mediation would be the first port of call if I cant make it work as is. I think we could benefit from councilling first to see if progress can me made before proceeding to Mediation.
I will look at the advicenow website to give me an idea on costs.
M