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Hi there. If anyone can help, i would be very grateful. I am speaking on behalf of my fiancee. His ex wife has stopped access to his children. It started with all of us suggesting she sees a professional about her depression. Her parents, my fiancee and me have all said she really needs to see someone. She has now taken offence to it and stopped his seeing the children. They are 8 and 11 and love their father. I need to know what rights she has to do this and whether my fiancee can do something so that he can see them. This is hurting him so much. I look forward to speaking to someone. Thank you
Hi JJC and welcome 🙂
Just a couple of questions, was he married when the children were born? Is he named on the birth certificates? This is just to ascertain if he has Parental Responsibility (PR).
Are there any contact arrangements in place as part of the divorce settlement?
I think my advice would be to write her a letter and request that she reinstate contact. Try and keep it fairly informal and non threatening, but tell her that the children have the right to have both parents in their lives and how upsetting and unsettling it is for them to be denied contact with their father, with whom they have a close and loving bond. Tell her that if she refuses then the only options open to you are to take it to Mediation and if that fails, Court. You could say that it is the ethos of the court that it is in the best interests of the children that both parents are involved in their upbringing. Tell her that it would be much better for everyone concerned if you can both sort this out between yourselves as Mediation and Court would be expensive and put unnecessary strain on everyone involved, including the children who would have to be interviewed.
You could apologise for having upset her and point out that you were only concerned for her and didn't wish to interfere, but that if her depression is affecting the children then it becomes your concern.
Suggest that she contact you to discuss making arrangements for contact to restart, but if you haven't heard from her within 14 days you will have no other alternative but to take it to Mediation, and if that fails you would apply to the Court for a defined Contact Order.
Here's a link to the Mediation Service - www.nfm.org.uk
There is a charge for this service but if your fiancé is on benefits or a low income there is Legal Aid available. To see if you might qualify here's a link to the Legal Aid calculator -
Www.gov.uk/check-legal-aid
There are some helpful stickys about representing yourself in court and one about the C100 form, which is the form you would use to,apply to the court for contact....these can be found at the top of the Legal Eagle section.
Best of luck 🙂
I meant to say keep copies of the letter and any correspondence or texts and emails and obtain proof of posting from the post office when posting anything.
- Samaritans – call 116 123
- Shout – text the word ‘Shout’ to 85258
