[Solved] Police - another alledged incident

Hi all,
As most of you know I was accused of assault when I contacted police back in December due to her behaviour. She used this as a chance to allege an assault

I had a similar experience.

I was being assaulted by my ex-wife so I called the police.

A policeman took me outside and talked to me. I was quite angry at the whole situation; the policeman said that in his opinion it was the man that caused the problems. So without any evidence he came to the conclusion that I "must" have started it.

My ex-wife was inside bawling her eyes out.........such a sterling performance. She claimed that I had attacked her. She had "bruises" on her arms. The only thing that I had done was to grab her arms to prevent her punching me in the face.

I was asked to leave as my ex-wife had the bruises to show that I had assaulted her.

She didn't press charges.

So a situation where she had kicked me in the groin, had hit me many times with a wet mop and had tried to punch me in the face turned into an "assault by me" when I called the police out.

It was pathetic and it showed me how unprofessional the Police can be.

I'm afraid that the police are often faced with an impossible situation where they haven't been witness to the events, and have to face two totally conflicting stories - I suppose the easy option is that a women is more often considered defenceless so that's what they go with. Part of the problem is that DV against men is still not widely accepted, partly because the men involved are more reluctant to report it.

Well for starters she conveniently 'forgot' to tell the officers that I have a court order in place......I'll be bringing along my 'bible' with around 1000 pages for them to sift through too.

Ah, that always helps - I had a huge mass of papers for my own case years ago (there was no DV alleged, so it's not quite the same), the courts don't tend to be too sympathetic if you can prove that the other party is lying to the judge.

One thing I find useful, especially if you have a smartphone, is to scan important documents and to put them in a dropbox folder (dropbox is free for small users) - that way I have access to those documents wherever I am, and even if I don't have my phone with me, as long as I can get access to a PC, I can bring up those documents (not just court documents, works well for passports for the family, certificate of insurance etc etc)

I had a similar incident to this,

I went to pick my kids up from my ex-partners on the day of my agreed visitation. upon her opening the door I was confronted with "have you got money" to which I replied "not on me but I can transfer it later on". she slams the door in my face and starts yelling through the door "no money no access". So I'm like I just travelled 2 hours to get here by bus but if you want to be childish and mess me around them I'm going. So I just went and sat on a bench for a few minutes, and my mobile starts going off text messages like "so you dont want to see your kids etc...", I ignore her and then she calls me "come back to the house".

So I go back to the house, and In the space of 3-4 mins shes changed her mind again! "you can't have them until you give me money" she says and if I don't like it I can go get a solicitor. and I'm stuck outside her house at 11am on a Saturday in the freezing cold and then two police officers come rushing up to me. Whats the problem I ask? "we've been called for a domestic disturbance" but during this time I've been calm and not even warranted anyone calling the police. one officer takes my details while another goes into the house to talk to her. he comes back out "apparently shes called the police over it' and they pretty much told her off for wasting their time and made her hand my kids over to me.

the officer informs me that "she's called us because you have her bank card, and she wants it back". why could of she not just asked me for it? we had a joint account but I gave her weekly money and was waiting to get paid that week so was going to transfer it later. I only had £200 in my account and did not want to go O/D if she decided to take it all out. But the amazing thing was that the officer made me hand over the card but then said sneakily "There is a cashpoint over the road, you've got a head-start" priceless.

A few days after this incident she lets me know that the police have given her an alarm and said I'm not allowed in the property and there is a black mark against it, in the event of future incidents. But I'm suspecting that these were just porkie pies.

The one piece of advice I would give is to shut down the joint account now - if your ex takes you seriously overdrawn, you are jointly liable.

I'd keep the joint acct, remove the O/D facility then have your wages paid into a seperate bank and just use the joint acct for your share of the bills etc.

Yep, that could work, but the danger is that if you pay money in to cover the bills, she could draw it out and the bills don't get paid. Depends on how much you trust her.