[Solved] Residence Order Conflict

Hi sykat 🙂

My advice to you would be to telephone the police and explain your situation, ask them as you have PR and the children are asking to stay with you because of safeguarding issues with their mother, what their stance would be. If there wasn't a Residence Order in place I would say that the police wouldn't involve themselves or interfere as its a civil matter. With an RO, it's still a civil matter but its a grey area too and some police forces will enforce it ...we had a member on here recently that had an RO but the police wouldn't get involved and return the child to him. I looked into it as my son has an RO and I found that it just depends on the police force and the circumstances surrounding it.

As your boys are 12 and 14 they are old enough to have their wishes and feelings taken into account. Give the police a call and if you get a favourable response then call the SS and let them know what you are going to do next time you have the boys, and why,and ask for their support.

Good luck 🙂

thanks for your response the trouble is there would be two constabularies involved because of the locations we live so heres to making my kids safe and happy!!

I would call your local police but ask them about it. The police may want to speak to the boys about the assault.

I have sent you a PM 🙂

Hi Sykat

You are in a grey area here, if you did not return the children, technically you would be in breach of the Residence Order. However, if the children came to you at the weekend and said that some assault or violence happened to them this week, I would say, don't return them and apply to the Court on the following working day for an Interim Residence Order. Unfortunately, I think the incidents you have referred to would be too old to use in that way, they would however support a new allegation.

How recent was the emotional harm to your eldest.

What have the Police said?

have you spoken to the mother and told her that the boys have said they want to live with you? If so what was her response. Did you speak to her about your children's safety?

Your remaining option would be to apply to the Court for a Residence Order and let matters take their course. CAFCASS make a report, and bearing in mind the ages of the children, some weight would be given to their feelings and what they want.

I'm not sure i would talk to the mother about it, she's not going to admit to the abuse and she may take it out on the boys because they've talked to you about it sykat.

An application for residence can take months but you could apply for an emergency residence order, that would be heard in a matter of a day or two.

I'd still find out what the position of the police is first though. 🙂

Yes, I don't mean the abuse, I should have been clearer just the fact that the boys have asked to live with you.

I did think about an Emergency Order, but if the abuse was a few weeks ago, I don't think you would get it. However if it was i.e. this week you could.

Even just telling the mother that the boys want to leave and live with Dad could cause them problems.

I think sykat mentions that along with the physical abuse of the younger child, the older child is being emotionally harmed and this appears to be ongoing, so can be considered as current. The physical abuse to the younger child could be factored in.

That's why I thought I would ask some more questions 🙂

Whether it be taken to court as an emergency RO, an RO, or by the mother to enforce the RO, the childrens wishes and feelings will hold sway...factor in the domestic abuse both boys have/are suffering and the case for the boys to live with Dad becomes more compelling.

The other point to consider is when the RO was awarded. if it was pre 2008 it is likely that a Warning Notice wasn't attached, which would mean that the mother would have to apply for an attachment of the Warning Notice before any enforcement of the RO could be applied.

When did the mother gain the RO sykat?

Thank you all for your responses and we have taken your advice. We have spoken to all the agencies that we can and have basically come to the conclusion that we will need to inform the police but because there is no power of arrest on the court order they will only ensure the children are safe and they advised us to infrom the Social Services and get the children to discuss things with childline who may act on their behalf in respect of their mother but in any event I can excersize my Parental Responsibility to the children and withdraw them from their current situation and apply for residence as soon as possible after there refusal to return home.

Cheers everyone
sy

That's great news sykat! 🙂

When you apply for Residency please don't hesitate to ask for any advice or support that you need. There are some helpful stickys at the top of the Legal Eagle section, two about self representing and another about the C100 form, which is the form you would need to submit to court for Residence.

Thanks for keeping us in the loop and please let us know how you get on. 🙂