I asked social services for support in feb 2020 as I was being verbally and physically abused by my now ex wife in front of our children. I honestly thought this might help her to get the the help she needed via them. How wrong was I. Despite my hospital reports, photos, voice recordings of horrific abuse in front of kids, she made up a pack of lies.. they spent too long trying to work out who the perpetrator and the victim were and refused to acknowledge my evidence.
They asked me contact Black Country women’s aid which is a DV charity and I got an idva. Best thing they did for me and the kids. She was only offered group work with a rival charity. She complained about this and the social worker. My IDVA suggested I take out a non mol, occupation and child arrangements but i refused on the basis that she would tell our children I was trying to get her taken away.
My idva was worried about her getting the same advice as me and becoming a proper victim. She was right.
I filed for divorce discreetly. She intercepted my wedding certificate from the GRO and divorced me which I was ok about.
but a few days later I got a non mol, occupation and child arrangements served on me by her on the basis I’d abused her and she was worried about my reaction to divorce.
my solicitor told me to retaliate. We served them back and ended up with non mols being cancelled and undertakings. 3 day fact find to sort the other two. I’ve got loads of evidence, she has lied. But I’m a man. Social services have gender discriminated me and I’ve made a complaint. Social worker hates me because I make point of reading her biased reports and writing back.
if anyone needs support fee free to reach out. My first two hearings were vacated and I have my next one in September. I’m lucky as my parents have financially backed me through this and I’ve got a good legal team. But if I knew what I knew now I could have done a lot more myself..
ive also complained to local government about my treatment.
the undertakings were a life changer and I’ve given up smoking, alcohol and caffeine whereas she is doing all three in excess.
stay strong fellow fathers and if anyone needs help please reach out I’d be happy to give back.