[Solved] Who can pick up daughter from school

Hi Noel

Unless prior arrangements have been made, your father will not be able to collect your daughter from school. Only those with PR can collect the children, unless as I said, prior arrangements have been made.

From the sounds of it your ex will not allow that arrangement to be made, unless it is to fit in with your contact weekends, If your contact is to continue after your child and you want your father to collect her, I would suggest that initially you discuss it with your ex. If not apply for mediation.

So does that mean then that as I have PR, I also have to authorise who can pick our daughter up ? For example, do I have to agree if my ex's Mom wants to pick her up as well ? Surely as I have joint PR, I can tell the school that My Dad is picking my daughter up ?
Thanks
Noel

Yes, as your ex will have authorised her mother to collect the children. Its for safety for the school to avoid abduction which as you know does go on!

If your contact continues, I would tell the school that you authorise your father to collect. However many schools vary, and they want confirmation of that from the mother too.

In the nursery's case it could be that because your ex is paying their fees, she is the resident parent, that is why they will not agree to your father being put back on. What excuse did they give you for that? Does the ex' mother pick the child up from nursery?

I understand why they have to be careful, it makes sense. I guess if the school see me and my Dad picking her up a few times, they should be OK. But yes, I will have that conversation with the school.
They apologised to me when they did it as they had a new starter at the nursery who didn't understand things properly, so as soon as I told them I had took legal advice ( From CORAM ) they put my name straight back on. It did seem senseless taking my name off without discussing it with me first, as they have seen me picking her up and dropping off every other week for the last 2 years ! However, they state they cannot put my Dad back on as he doesn't have PR - again, they have seen him pick her up regularly the last 2 years too.
Unfortunately my ex chooses to make my life awkward for me and knows the best way to get at me is our daughter. And Yes, my ex's mother picks her up as well.
Thanks

Hi it may help to look at the report below

'Schools, "Parents" and "Parental Responsibility" - Ref DfEE 0092/2000

This is Guidance for schools, which defines a parent under the Education Act 1996 as 'all natural parents, whether they are married or not' then goes on to say that the General Principle that schools should follow is, to treat all parents equally, unless there is a court order limiting an individual's exercise of parental responsibility.
I would say you have as much right to approach the school and give permission for your Dad to be able to pick up your child in case you cant , although the school wont want to get involved in disputes they may very well listen to your exs silly demands as she is classed as the main carer

AK57 is right, but schools are very careful about getting involved until they have spoken to their Legal Department! LOL!!! As for nurseries, I don't know where they go for information or even how far they go, I have never had to have that involvement, but given what AK says about "Schools Parents and Responsibility" I agree with him, as her mother can collect the child, so can your father, but as she is main carer, I suspect they will say that. However you could always say to her she allows her mother to collect the child, so there is no problem with your father collecting ....equality! I suppose that if she refuses, you could refuse to allow her mother to collect the child. But then you could be opening a can of worms and if you took it further it could be seen as "[censored] for tat", which isn't good. Whereas if you took it further you could request that your father be allowed to collect too

I'll play devil's advocate here for a moment, in that it may be worth considering the school's position - they are finding themselves in the middle of a dispute where their job really should be just looking after children during the day and make sure that they are safe until the point where they are handed back to the parents. They must assume that the parent with care has been deemed by a court to be able to make decisions regarding who is safe to act on her behalf, they can't necessarily make the same assumptions about the non-resident parent, and it's not the schools job to keep track of the wider family, however unjust that may seem - consider the school's position if something were to go seriously wrong. So they either have to look into the background of each individual case, which they do not have the time, resources or possibly even the legal ability to do, or they apply a simple rule, which is what they have done - the guide is simply that, something they can refer to for help, but it's not a set of rules they must adhere to.