My wife and i split at the start of the year and I moved into a flat locally. Kids have been to stay with no issues, but i moving 45mins away now due to cheaper housing costs.
My ex isn't the nicest person and has been quite nasty and made it difficult for me to see them more when i have requested it. To the point where she doesn't want me to text and i have to go through her dad.
So tonight i asked if the kids were aware im moving yet, as she said she would tell the. Reply was he doesn't think so. Now there is no SS involvement or CIN etc. But he informed me that they have been advised that SS make a visit to the property? I'm a little lost with this as this was not done at my current address. I fear its just a scare tactic and another lie like many i've been told over recent months.
Is this true for anyone else? As i feel a little sad, its a little grade 2 cottage and is not in a [censored] hole.
Sorry if this is the wrong section, only one where i thought it made sense to post.
Hi there
Its unusual for this to happen unless thereβs SS involvement. Have you called SS to ask them what its about and whether or not they are involved with the children?
If they do want to visit, just make sure its child friendly, but I wouldn't worry if your home is ok. It will make her look pretty silly anyway.
Your ex sounds difficult so please be careful about contact with her, its very easy for these women to get an injunction out against ex partners, often just to make contact with kids more difficult.
All the best
It turned out social services hadn't advised this, but would not tell me who had advised it.
Now i've just had a message from her father saying she's stopped contact all together as i've treated my younger daughter differently to my 11 yr old son. All i did different once was buy her a toy, to which a few weeks later i bought my son an xbox game. I take my daughter the park and i've taken my son the cinema a few times and bowling. Most the time he's happy relaxing as hes autistic ( as is my ex )
I'm at a total loss as what i should do now. i don't even know what my children are being told about me not being able to see them.
Hi there
As I said it would be unusual, they probably made the visit to your property up.
Her reasoning to stop contact wonβt stand up in my opinion. I wouldnβt leave this too long before doing something about it. You have a couple of options, the first step is to try mediation, which is a requirement before a court application can be made.
I would explain to the mediator that she refuses to communicate with you and if she agrees to mediation at all it would probably be undertaken with you in separate rooms and the mediator moving between the two of you, this is called shuttle mediation.
If mediation doesnβt work, or she refuses o attend, the mediator will sign the form to enable you to apply for a Child Arrangements Order. To submit the C100 form will cost a one off fee of Β£215, but you can instruct a solicitor to act for you, although this will cost thousands.
If you decide to go ahead without a solicitor we will do all we can to advise and support you, many dads here have self represented with much success.
All the best
Ive contacted the family members institue, is this the right step?
We are a part of FMI but I wasnβt aware that they offered mediation services. If they canβt offer you the service in your area, you can check out National Family Mediation here
www.nfm.org.uk
I didn't know what they offered tbh, but thank you i will try that link.
What is the cost of it as i don't really have much money at all, which she knows. She has every benefit under the sun.
If sheβs claiming benefits then the initial consultation, called a MIAM will be free for you too. After that sessions can cost roughly anything from Β£90 - Β£120... more or less.
If youβre on a low income, you may qualify for some help, ask the mediator for more information.
Thank you Mojo π
Youβre welcome G
Its real difficult this, i've always been good and fair to the kids taking into account their ages. Shes even had him delete me off my 11yr old sons xbox and blocked me on whats app. I would hardly message at all other than i love you bro or looking forward seeing tomorrow, ask your mum what she like of you all ( the kids, never got answer but i got her something anyway off them )
Just don't get why there is this need block me from seeing them π