I have a court order for my 13 year old daughter and 15 year old son.
Order states half of holidays with me, and term time - every other weekend + Sunday evening on non contact weekend.
My ex hates having the order as she is not in full control, she tries every trick in the book to make things difficult and now kids are older is often making plans on my days with them, then saying 'kids are old enough to choose now'
She has wiggled her way back in to seeing the kids when it's my contact time, eg by taking them to clubs she arranged and then making it more convenient for them to go to her house first.
My son is older and more mature than my daughter, he is wise to her games, but my daughter is more easily manipulated. My ex does not like the Sunday evenings in particular so regularly finds reasons for kids not to come, my son sees through it, but my daughter gets stressed and I think become anxious.
In order to try and stop this ive said to my daughter to not stress, she doesn't have to come if she really doesn't want to. Ex has now taken this as 'now you've agreed she won't be coming, please increase the maintenance'. The reality is I know ex will be manipulating her and making sure there are plenty of reasons in place so that my daughter "chooses of her own free will not to come".
She has always made handover of the kids a stressful experience, so that coming to mine is not a smooth process like it should be.
I don't think there is much I can do really, can't see courts doing much (which ex knows), so just trying to be there for my kids, but hard knowing my daughter is having ex's wishes pushed upon her.
Anyone have any advice? Bit of rant I know!
Could you offer to take and pick the kids up from the clubs?
