[Solved] Anonymous Call

Hi There,

I wonder if they will put that much effort into investigating this.

I can see that you wish to be vindicated and hope that they do.

Is it a huge issue if they dont?

I know it means you are not vidicated but if there is no proof of who did it then you cannot be blamed. (ideally)

Regards,

Dave

Hi Dave,
There have been enough lies brought up in court trying to stop me from having access already. The judge was unimpressed with both of us. He was annoyed with me as he believed the lies & angry with the ex as she was unwilling to let our son out of her sight.
In the end, the judge told us to be adults & communicate & come back in 6 months. I've written to my ex, emailed her, texted her - she's just ignored that. She's even ignored letters from solicitors. She will only talk to me verbally so I have (in her words) "nothing to use against her in court".
I have a speech issue so I can't talk if I get stressed or get the wrong words. It's even worse when I'm interrupted mid sentence, which the ex is aware & always talks over me so I can't defend my position or ask for more contact.

Knowing how devious at least one of her siblings is, I wouldn't surprised if it was a ploy to make me seem vindictive to the judge.

If she will only speak to you directly and you feel she will lie about what is said, why not invest in one of those small recording (pen) cameras? My son's ex used one of those to record him at their house which has back fired on them as there is absolutely nothing to show him doing wrong. We are going to get one when he gets access to record pick ups and drop offs.

Ho Strokebloke,

I understand your asphasia, it must be difficult as she is clearly using it to her advantage.

Im not sure what to say mate as she is playing the game by only talkking on the telephone.

Can you explain this to the judge so that he can order communication via mail which is what happens in my situation?

The judge has to understand your situation and Id hope him to be sympathetic.

Regards,

Dave

Cuddles, I've tried to record a conversation in the past but as there were 3 of her family members there, most of it was difficult to understand. I will try a better recorder to see whether that helps.
I took proof into the last court session showing that I was trying to communicate & she wasn't. She had texted me to say that the Separated Parents course was pointless as the issues were nothing to do with her. I had photos showing how happy our son was with me.
The judge wasn't interested in facts as he had been bombarded with lies & exaggerations from her barrister.

Good afternoon

A couple of comments:

1. you might want to check the legality of recording conversations unless it is made clear / announced at the begining of each call.

2. hopefully not, but it might have been the ex reporting to SS herself in order to frame you. I know my ex would considering that she went well out of her way to get me a criminal record

All the best

Hi Dave,
I have aphasia & apraxia, so I tend to use email more than anything else. I have to work in a quiet room at home, can't work in an office.
The ex doesn't talk much on the phone, she might talk to me at her family's home surrounded by them. We did try to talk a while ago as she wanted something from me, but she would talk over me & not listen. When she accused me of lying to the court, I asked what the lie was, she said what it was, I reminded her that it wasn't a lie, she agreed that it wasn't a lie but still got offended & asked me to leave.
She hasn't agreed to talk since.

The judge had had enough in the last session & told us we need to communicate, he wasn't interested in my disability as I believe that he thought we could email or write - I have, she hasn't responded.
e.g. I asked a few questions such as what food our son is allowed & what he likes? That was in March, still waiting for a response...

Hi Donkey,
I don't think that a recording is allowed as evidence if the other person isn't informed.
Sounds like your ex & mine have been on the same course...

You are correct, the recorded evidence can't be used (though a judge does have the choice to allow it) - it can be used for your own use, so I would say that you would be able to record it and then transcribe the conversation and give that to the court.

It sounds like not much will amount from this so wouldnt get bogged down with the mind games.

Do you have a copy of all of social services notes?

BW

The only other thing I would say mate is be careful mentioning the functional disabilities of apraxia and aphasia - she might use it against you saying you are not able to share the residency of the children.

Good luck and just keep evidence of all the reasonable actions you did and highlight this in court.

BW

Boycie, I haven't had the SS notes yet, but should be sent them.

The ex tried to use my physical & mental issues from the strokes in court already. Saying that I would be too tired to look after him or to weak to pick him up.
I joked with my solicitor & pointed out that I'm strong enough with my weak arm to pick up her barrister.
My speech issues are only an issue when I get talked over/interrupted or if I'm stressed. Which of course means every time I talk to the ex.

I'm not asking for residency, I work full time & she moved (and took our son) 150miles away from me. So it wouldn't be fair to our son to live in two places. She chooses not to work to look after our son, so I'm unlikely to get more than a weekend at a time.