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Hi there, I would appreciate some advice over my forthcoming court date for contact order application, after trying fr six months to see my son, now seven month old, I had to make an application to the court. Just received her reply from solicitor and it states that she does not wish to block contact but wants it supervised due to allegations of domestic abuse. These are that during the relationship I was verbally abusive to her and that i threw a mobile phone at her, all are untrue. However she has been very manipulating throughout this and says she contacted a women's charity for dv for advice and they have noted this. She was very controlling throughout our relationship and this was the reason I left, I have emails from her about how we should have been building a family after I have left and she threatened me with all sorts when she was pregnant and we were separated. Can someone advise what will happen at the first hearing, I'm just sick of being made out to be something I'm not. I also work in social care and would appreciate some advice on whether these false accusations can affect my job even though there is no proof just her lies. Thanks
Sorry to hear you guys are going through the same as i and many othes seem too........the Flase DV allegaions!
it stinks it really stinks! seems the first thing they now say to add only delays and validate them breaking your contact with your child/children!
Keep a record, make notes of any and all confrontations you've ever had.....any texts, emails, letters where she is being the abusive one keep a record of....remember to add your replies and keep them all as proof should you need it.
we all say things in the "heat of the moment" i've called my ex from silly to stupid and a b*tch etc... for doing what she has done to me. every text or email converstation i produced at court was seen as just another argument i was trying to defend myself against her allegations or threats.
if she threatens you in any way....i.e. not letting you see the kids, refusing to let you speak to them, threats of what she'll do should you continue with courts etc... anything at all....keep and record......you may need it to prove her a liar! or the hateful person you now know her to be!
if she texts nasty things to you....DO NOT REPLY....keep it, record it and use it against her in court! if she phones you and starts being abusive down the phone....be polite, tell her you're not prepared to deal with her like that and put the phone down....make a note of what was said straight away, date, time etc... and keep it for court.
all these will help you build the picture up that she is the nasty vindictive one that she will try and make you out to be!
trust me guys....i've been through this one.....as have many other dads on here.......i've used them and the tricks and stunts my ex tried all to prove her a liar in court......the judge saw her in her true colours and ripped her a new hole back at the "Finding of Fact" hearing we ended up having to have due to her lies and false claims.
time is now to be and ensure you are "Whiter than White" .... do not under-estimate the depths your ex will go to! she will be told and encouraged to be as hateful and spitefull to you as humanly possible by her friends and people around her who only have her word to go on........they will all eventually see her for what she is when she's eventually proven a liar!
Karma really is a b*tch....and it will come around oneday!!!
I have photos of bruises and deep scratches on my arms from three separate incidents when I was assaulted prior to separation. I am holding on to these secretly as a weapon of last resort as it looks like we are going down the legal route. I took the photos when I was at work and only my solicitor knows they exist. Does the fact that I did not report anything at the time mean that this evidence is worthless? Incidents took place 6-18 months ago.
It would back up any statement you make to that effect - how much weight it would carry would be up to the judge, and also how relevant. Your solicitor would be the best person to advice if/when to use it.
...Do photos have the date they were taken on them...or does this depend on the camera used? I guess using a camera phone would be the best way to have an accompanying date to prove when the photos were taken. Hindsight would be a wonderful thing.
Without any proof of when they were taken, they could be contested by your ex... but I do think they are worth keeping in hand, and worth submitting to court if need be. 🙂
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