I have a surname that is 14 characters long. My son has my surname.
My ex wife has a surname that is 11 characters long.
She contacted me this week asking if I would agree to her changing are sons surname to a bouble barrelled one containing both our names.
I refused because it's an insane idea that is not in sons best interest but hers.
She is threatening to go to court citing that she doesnt want son to lose his maternal identity.
What are her chances?
She is primary carer and I'm the visiting parent. I see my son 2 times a week, every other weekend and half school holidays. He is 10 years old.
Hi
If she was suggesting a name change to hers the unlikely to be successful. However, my understanding is that the courts usually allow double barrelling (seems to be the solution when parents separate) , unless there is some compelling reason not to.
How old is child, and what is the reason you say it is not in the child's best interests? Is it because it will be too long? Many people have long, short, difficult to pronounce names, so I can't imagine length of surname would be a valid reason.
Not sure if anyone else on here has any experience of success on such a challenge.
All the best.
My son is 9 and he hasnt mentioned anything.
A double barrelled surname would result in my son have a 24 character long surname. I dont see how it will benefit him long term. Whether some here agree or not the reality is people are discriminated on many things throughout life. One of which is surnames and foreign sounding surnames. Both my ex and myself experienced it growing up and both had to often shorten our surnames during job applications since it became clear it was going against us. There have been studies and research to show that this type of discrimination still exists. Why make my sons life even harder for no reason.
My ex says she wants son to have connection to his maternal family but I dont see it. She is the residential parent, my son spends most of the time with her, so why is she questioning that.
Also, my ex has a partner who she plans to marry. If she marries she may change her surname and will cease to have a name the same as our son.
Another argument is that she says when travelling abroad its inconvenient since she needed to carry a birth certificate to prove they are related. A double barrelled surname will not address this issue since both their names wont match exactly and she will still have to show ID.
My solution is wait until my son is 18 or old enough to make his own choice rather than impose a 24 long surname on him due to his mothers insecurities.
I agree with all of your points, whether a court will see the name change as you do and therefore unreasonable I'm not sure...
If she wants to make it legal then she'll need a court order if you object. She has to do this on a C100 form and it costs £215. If she's on benefits or a low income, she could have this reduced. I can't help with a view on her chances but do understand why you are against it.
I would ask your son what his opinion is on this. I can seem exactly where you are coming from, but a court potentially will take his wishes into consideration. Is your ex also planning to change it by deed poll, or is she just planning on letting him be known by the dobule barrelled name?
Either way, your son has the option to change it back when he's older, and he has the advantage that it's your name on the birth certificate, so for most instances, he'd simply be able to ignore the fact that it had even happened, if that's his wish.
