Hello all.
I am after whatever advice I can get.
My wife left me in July of last year. She moved out of my property leaving our children in my care. I was obviously happy to maintain the care of the children.
She quickly began a new relationship within a week or two of leaving the family home and had very little contact with the children.
Eventually she started to see the children little by little and we worked back up to a 50/50 split.
My ex varied from loving and wanting to recommence a relationship with me to being extremely hostile. During this time she would continually state that she needed the children to be declared as living with her so that she can claim housing and benefits. My response was always that the children should not be used in any way and we should maintain a healthy fair split between us.
After around 6 months of separation I met a woman and began dating. When my ex found out about this she made false allegations to the police and children’s school about me. She removed our children from their school early so that I could not pick them up and she ran away with them severing all contact. After 2 weeks of not taking the children to school she enrolled the children in a new school, again without my permission. Due to the fact that I was cut off from my children I was forced to apply for a child arrangement order. In response to this my ex managed to obtain an emergent ex parte non molestation order against me all based off of extremely revolting false allegations.
I responded to appeal the non molestation order with an enormous amount of evidence to prove the allegations were false. However I have never been given a return hearing to plead my case. This is an obvious failing of the court process.
on top of this I found out that when I applied for the child arrangements order the same judge heard the NMO right before seeing me.
I have jumped through every hoop and done everything by the book. I have fully engaged with CAFCASS. However my ex has done none of this. She has ignored solicitors and CAFCASS.
We had a hearing this week after 10 weeks of not having any contact with my children.
The judge seemed to be pandering to my ex and favouring her. None of my evidence for the non mol had been considered and all I got was a quick “sorry that hasn’t been dealt with”.
The judge did state that my ex’s actions were wrong for the fact that she took them from me and their school and ran away was wrong, but that was all.
Now whilst we are now waiting for a fact finding hearing my ex is being allowed to maintain control of our children and heavily dictate what I can and can not do even though CAFCASS have raised safeguarding concerns against her and my evidence raises concerns.
i feel as though I have been let down by the system and she has been allowed to do what ever she wants when ever she wants just because she is a mother.
what can I do? My legal team are playing by the books as I would expect, but I am not being given fair opportunity to be a loving father.
Please help.
hi,
would have been great to avoid a fact find hearing. but as it's on now, can concentrate on that, and hopefully it goes in your favour. are Cafcass doing a section 7 report also?
@bill337 thank you for your reply. Yes CAFCASS will be doing a full report now.
It baffles me that she did not engage with them the first time round and CAFCASS raised their own concerns from her medical history, yet she is still allowed to dictate and be favoured by the courts. I have been given no opportunity for fairness by the court.
It's clear from what you've shared that your ex's actions have been manipulative and unjust, and it's especially disheartening to hear that the judge's rulings seem to be favoring her unfairly. It's not right that she's able to dictate your relationship with your kids while disregarding legal processes and concerns raised by CAFCASS. I wish I had a magic solution for you, but all I can offer is my sympathy and solidarity. Keep leaning on your legal team, keep pushing for fair treatment, and don't lose hope. And if you haven't already, maybe consider reaching out to a divorce lawyer Oceanside for some additional support and guidance through this difficult time. You deserve every chance to be the loving father you want to be, and I hope things start looking up for you soon.
