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Any advice would be most welcome. So here goes...
Have been separated from my wife for nearly three years and have our own houses. We have two children aged 6 and 7. Things are pretty amicable and financially we have things worked out. The children stay with me for four nights per week and I tend to have them all though school holidays. However I received a petition for divorce this morning - although my wife has not made any financial claims she states on the petition that the children live with her and that I 'see them' several times a week and at weekends. I am not happy about simply signing this and returning it (we are trying to avoid solicitors). It simply isn't the case that they live with her - residency is shared. If I don't question this, might there be ramifications at some future point?
Any thoughts gratefully received!
There certainly would be consequences - if they live with her more than you, then she gets the child benefit, and then you are liable to pay maintenance to her. Coming to a financial arrangement over maintenance is of limited value as after a year, she can approach the CSA who can (currently) override any court order and you'd end up paying despite any agreement in the divorce. I would have a word with the Citizens Advice Bureau on this, assuming you don't currently have a solicitor.
Thanks ACTD - she's always had the child benefit while I pay for most of the everyday expenses anyway including food and childcare. I'm just wary of signing a form that states the children primarily reside with her, when the reality is that they don't.
OK, you could look at it another way - if you sign the statement, you are making a false declaration to the court. If possible, write down all the dates they have stayed overnight recently, and keep a diary from now on.
That's what has worried me - if I sign it, I am making a false statement. I will talk to her and say that I am not defending the petition but that I just want it adjusted to reflect the reality of our current arrangements.
ACTD is so right, you are signing a false statement. particularly when you tell us that you are having the children far more than stated in the Petition, my betting is that she is saying this because of benefits/child benefit allowance. Sounds like you are paying for an awful lot too!!
Can I also say here and now that while you are not involving solicitors, depending on the finances/property between you or not, you should also have a Consent Order, because if for instance you won the lottery in 2 years or 10 years and there is no consent order between you, she has the opportunity of coming after you for more money.....the court will of course consider all the circumstances and how long she took, but it has been known to happen and why everyone is NOW urged to enter into a Consent Order.
Even though she has made no financial claims on you now, if you won the Lottery, she COULD not would, make a claim..
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