Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: We are not open to new posts at this time
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
Hey Fellow Dads,
I am after a bit of advice, and guidance.
I currently get to see my 13 month old son every Sunday from 9am til 6pm, though 2 hours of that is lost in travelling time.
I want to have Noah over night at weekends, but my ex blankly refuses until he is 2 years old. If I can't do this I have little option to see more of him. I can't see him at night really, as I cannot get to him until 6pm because of my job, and she insists he is returned at 7pm, and I live an hour away from her.
Also she will not let me have Noah on Saturdays and Sundays.
My question is this: Is it worth my while going to court to fight for visitation on an overnight basis?
I cannot see that there is an age where it is acceptable to have your child overnight, but I cannot see any guidelines either. I have somewhere to live that is secure and clean, and I have family locally to help out should it be required.
I do not have much free cash so the £170 to get it to court would be providied by my parents, and I would have no solicitor to fight my case for me either.
Apologies if this seems jumbled, but I hope you all get the jist and can offer some help.
Thanks.
Hi
Firstly, if possible, it is always best to avoid going to court if there is an alternative, and the first step should be mediation (you'd need to have been through this, or at least have tried to go to mediation, in any event before going to court).
Secondly, you may be entitled to legal assistance, so it's worth finding out if you are and if so, apply early.
Going to court can be a slow process, so is it worth going to court as, by the time you get there, your son would be getting on for 2 years old anyway, and you would simply have made communication harder by going to court?
Instead, you could try to negotiate with your ex - suggest an overnight stay once a month for a few months, then every couple of weeks - perhaps suggesting that it will ease him into weekly overnight stays when he's 2 years old.
Bottom line is it's better to negotiate and give a little if possible before considering going to court.
- Samaritans – call 116 123
- Shout – text the word ‘Shout’ to 85258
