Child benefit

Hi everyone

Please, I need help. Briefly, had Court order (every other weekend and half of all holidays) in 2016. In the past 8 months, agreed with mother equal shared care of our two children (13/14) week on/off; which is working really well and our children love it as I live quite close to mother/school, etc. At the start of week on/off, mother agreed for me to claim Child benefit (CB) and Child tax credit (CTC) for one child as we share all cost of raising our children equally. We communicate via only, as such equal shared care & CR/CTC agreements were through email, no legal document. Mother said we are both capable of agreeing and not involve a third party. Few months ago, I spoke to Child benefit about claiming for one child, the adviser said if mother write or email them it will make the process quicker. So emailed mother about what CB office advised; mother said she will write or email CB. In second email, mother said she found CB details and will email them for me to claim for one child. Two weeks ago, email from mother stating, she will let things be the way they are as she does not want to open can of warms. I'm quite confused why mother changed her mind and what she said; considering mother has been quite helpful recently. In past two years, CMS falsely claimed and chased me for £7400 that doesn't exist; fortunately, mother emailed and explained that I don't owe her or CMS money in unpaid child maintenance, that we have amicable and equal shared care of our children which is working well.

Anyone been in similar situation? I appreciate all, mother's help and don't want to do anything that may upset her; however, if I don't claim CB for one child as I had explained to mother, there is no formal/legal document that prove equal shared care in past 8 months and CMS can come back to me anytime; considering traumatic experiences with CMS over the years. Thank you.