Good evening, it's my first post.
Since the birth of my daughter in June 2014, her mother and I have not officially agreed on an amount of maintenance money. She has explicitly said that she doesn't want any CSA involvement. I've agreed but she doesn't accept any maintenance money into her bank account.
I have been putting aside money each month into a savings account (in my name) for my daughter. This money is essentially a mix of maintenance money, and any 'extras' for the future e.g college etc. I also purchase books, clothes, toys, shoes and also lunches every week (I visit their place every weekend and stay for a whole day- either a Saturday or Sunday).
The reason for my message today is that last weekend the mother said that she wanted to open an account in our daughter's name (my daughter doesn't have my surname) and asked me to wire over all the money into that account. Does this sound like a reasonable request? I was a bit surprised when she asked me. My first issue is why doesn't she want me to put the money into her (the mother's) account. The second point of contention for me is this money is 3+ years of maintenance money plus extra money for college etc as mentioned earlier- surely she can't have it all??
Another query is if this did get to a court hearing would the court consider the lunches, outings, clothes, toys etc that I have bought over the last 3 years as being part of the maintenance payments ie would evidence of these payments be deductible from the final total maintenance monies that I will give her.
This situation is really baffling me so appreciate any thoughts/ suggestions.
Thank you
Chris
Hello BillR,
The money you have in your name for your daughter is solely in your control.
If you "wire over all the money" into an account in your daughter's name, I'm assuming the mother will be the signatory on the account therefore the money will be solely in her control.
I would avoid opening an account in your daughters name and both you and the mother being signatories as this could cause friction between you if you disagree. Added to which you would have to decide how you could withdraw any money. This would mean either choosing that you could act independently from one another (severally) or that both of you had to sign to withdraw money (jointly).
The court will not concern themselves with what is or isn't paid when it is an arrangement between yourselves which it is and has always been.
Have you considered paying directly the maintenance money (an amount agreed upon by both of you) to the mother and you keep the other money you are saving for your daughter in the account you already use which would then remain in your control ? By doing this it would be a compromize which would be to the benefit of you, the mother and your daughter.
Whatever financial arrangements you choose to make between yourselves is entirely between the two of you. The C.M.S. will not get involved unless either you or the mother open a case for child maintenance with them. If either of you did open a case with them it starts from the day the case is opened and no back payments for the preceding years can be claimed.
If you want a guide to what maintenance you would be paying if you were involved with the C.M.S. you can go to their website and use the calculator which may be useful in deciding the amount you could pay the mother.
Thank you very much for your response- I think I understand the situation much better now.
I'll obviously continue to put money aside for my daughter however the issue of recovery of maintenance can only be made from the date a case is formally opened and not retrospectively i.e. from the day the child was born. Am I correct?
Kind regards
Hello BillR,
Payment of CHILD maintenance can only be made from the date a case with the C.M.S. is formally opened by either the mother or father and it cannot be back dated to when the child was born.
I make a point of highlighting CHILD maintenance as opposed to maintenance for a wife when going through divorce proceedings.
Hi There,
.
I agree that I wouldn't be inclined to transfer the money into an account that your ex has control over, If you are putting the money aside then either keep it where it is, or as suggested start to transfer an amount that you agree on, to your ex.
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GTTS