I have tried social services, but they have been told by my ex that I do not have parental responsibility (not true, but how do I prove this?) and so have refused to tell me anything, even when requested in writing.
Are you on theyre birth certificate? If you are can you get a copy and send it to SS?
Regards,
Dave
Sorry I can't offer you any advice Dennis39, but I do feel your pain and frustration. The whole system is appalling. My oldest son has now been removed from the system, which is good news, but the damage to my bank account is beyond repair and I will probably have to start bankruptcy proceedings soon or pray for a miracle! As for the damage to my relationship, I don't know. We had so much planned, wedding, buying a home, family. My girlfriends dreams and hopes all destroyed in one phone call from the CSA! She cries a lot and I just don't know what to say or do to make the misery of everything go away. I see the CSA from both sides, as I am being destroyed but my brother in law just tells the CSA that he has retired (he is working also),as he left the army and pays £5 a month and that was after a fight and can't even be bothered to see them or support them in any way shape or form and it is losers like him that cripple us that want to do the best for our children. oh and very disturbed ex partners! I hope there is a light at the end of the tunnel for those of you suffering difficulties seeing or supporting your children and wish you all the best.
Seems the CSA are [censored] bent in continuing hound parents for payments even when it is clear the payment are no longer required.
The experience I've had with the CSA are enough to put me off from having anymore children 😮
At times, I really do believe they get some kind of benefit out of keeping parents in the system longer than they need to be.
I see the CSA from both sides, as I am being destroyed but my brother in law just tells the CSA that he has retired (he is working also),as he left the army and pays £5 a month and that was after a fight and can't even be bothered to see them or support them in any way shape or form and it is losers like him that cripple us that want to do the best for our children.
That is exactly the problem - the CSA was set up to deal with a problem and the sheer number of cases means they have to apply a formula - some get away scott free, others are stuffed by the system because of those people. The CSA isn't the root of the problem - the real problem are non resident parents who won't face up to their responsibilities, and the rest end up paying.
I've got the pleasure of 2 cases with the CSA, one for my Eldest child that I have no contact with (though her younger siblings are), and another for my youngest three. Recently my ex partner of my youngest three has decided that the CSA are awful and has asked if we can return to a private arrangment.
Needless to say I was more than happy to accept. Upon speaking to the CSA I enquired about how long I need to pay for my Eldest child on the first case, as they are now 20 and a half, has been in full time employment for their last two years and isn't enrolled in any kind of further education.
I was informed it would be until the next birthday (21), I was also informed that I was in credit with the other account and would likely get that money returned once the case was closed.
A couple of hours later I got a call whilst at work, again from the CSA, to inform me that they had closed my eldest childs account as from November 2013, and because of this there was now arrears on the Second account. Needless to say I was gobsmacked at this, as this inferred that as there was an overpayment to account 1, I would have to pay the missing money to Account 2 as they were entitled to it, I was told that "Its not that bad you have credit on your account, so that will cover most of it". I was rather angry so after a few choice words I left it for the time being.
I have spoken to the CSA today and actually got a nice lady that seemed to know what she was talking about, I enquired when I should have stopped paying for my eldest and was told that as her Mother was still recieving Child Benefit upto the week before her 20th Birthday, she was entitled to payment up until then.
I mentioned that fact that she was in full time employment and had been for some time, but the lady just reiterated that it goes off Child Benefit payments.
So after looking up a few things, it would appear that as my Eldest did a couple of terms at college between 16 & 17, I should really have stopped paying for her (I realise that the difference in the money would then transfer to the second account and that I would be no better off anyway) when she hit 18 (In November, she would have left college around the March before).
To me this means she's now had 2+ years of money that wasn't owed to her, and could infact have gone to my youngest trio.
I realise I sound bitter, but I have always paid for this child, never missing a payment and was involved in her life up until 16 when issues with her mother stopped contact.
Is there any advice about who I should be speaking to regarding this over payment, as all the CSA will say is that she was recieving Child Benefits so was entitled to it, but surely it can't be that simple? They did say they would claim the overpaid money back from her and I would recieve a seperate call regarding this.
As for the outstanding money from account 2, I'm just going to bite the bullet, pay the lump sum they want and then start a private arrangment. My blood pressure cant take any more dealings with these people 🙁
Until they are 21??? Again another CSA worker that hasn't got a clue!
I would write to your MP and also lodge a complaint with the CSA (not that it will probably do any good as they will say you should have rang them when your eldest left college at 16/17)
They amaze me when they say they will claim the over payment back from the PWC, it will never happen or if it did it would be something stupid like £1 a week or if they are on benefits they won't touch them
Thank you for the reply Huxley,
I have to admit to being very Naive with the CSA, I assumed that as they were brought in against my wishes, and the fact I had no say about either the amounts paid or who they were being paid too, that they were responsible for all of that.
I therefore (wrongly in this case) assumed that as the money was deducted directly from my wages by the CSA, that it would be apportioned correctly by them. As I said I have no contact with my eldest, I only know that shes been in full time employment as my younger children informed me.
I again assumed that they checked with the ex partners to see if their circumstances had changed, as they were the instigators of the claims.
I was really hoping that as (At least this is how I see it) I have given them my money, and they have incorrectly apportioned it to a party not entitled to recieve it, that I couldn't possibly be responsible for any underpayment to the other party again due to their error.
I was quite confident that they would bully the overpaid party in a similar way to how they did me when they re-assessed me following her claim, and take the money back at a rate that would be difficult to afford. I'm now getting the impression that i might not see the overpaid £500+ 🙁 As I said I also suspect it has been overpaid for far longer.
I sort of wish I hadn't have asked now, I'm going to struggle to sleep tonight. 🙁
Yes you do need to keep on top of the CSA unfortunately they don't check if circumstances have changed off their own back
I expect I will be in this situation when mine get to 17/18 as the ex is likely still to claim CB and not tell them
Surely in this day and age the CSA should be able to look into the child benefit situation, not just shrug it off saying "it's still being paid to the PWC therefor CSA is still due" when we all know the PWC is fraudently claiming
I would defiantly write to your MP and explain that CB is still being claiming when it shouldn't and you are paying CSA still when it's not due, my MP was quite good (different situation to yours), he wrote to the chief executive of the CSA, who then passed the buck to one of his minions it did move things along though
I think that in these cases, it's not the CSA's fault, but the benefits office who seem to be very slow. We recently had a form saying that as my daughter was approaching 16, child benefit would stop unless we declared that she was continuing in education (and have to state where) - so it's not a matter of failing to inform the benefits office that a child has left - there is a definite active act to give false information, it's fraud pure and simple, and they should be clamping down hard on it.
I quite agree actd, this is the thing thats left the bitterest taste in my mouth, Either no checks were made by the benefits office or my ex blatantly lied about her circumstances and yet its the like of myself that have to foot the bill. To add insult to injury, On some of the paperwork I recieved today is the paragraph -
"It is a criminal offence for anyone who is liable to pay child maintenance to fail to tell us of a change of address....
As someone who is liable to pay child maintenance, if you change your address and don't tell us within 7 days, you may be subject to criminal proceedings and a penalty of up to £1000"
Yet little interest in either sorting out their own mistakes or looking into potential fraudulent claims :*(
I think that in these cases, it's not the CSA's fault, but the benefits office who seem to be very slow. We recently had a form saying that as my daughter was approaching 16, child benefit would stop unless we declared that she was continuing in education (and have to state where) - so it's not a matter of failing to inform the benefits office that a child has left - there is a definite active act to give false information, it's fraud pure and simple, and they should be clamping down hard on it.
I didn't know they wrote just before the child approaches 16, so if at 16 the child is continuing in education do they write again at regular interverals to see if they have left? Or is this where it all goes wrong, they don't follow up and neither does the PWC
The PWC could act dim and say "oh I didn't realise I had to inform them again"
I didn't know they wrote just before the child approaches 16, so if at 16 the child is continuing in education do they write again at regular interverals to see if they have left? Or is this where it all goes wrong, they don't follow up and neither does the PWC
The PWC could act dim and say "oh I didn't realise I had to inform them again"
I didn't know either until we got the letter 😀 though my wife remembers getting them for our other children, so it's not new. The child benefit for the older children did stop when they finished A levels, so I think we got letters then also.