Hi. I'm in need of some advice. My 14 year old daughter wants to live with me and my new wife after having several months of unhappiness with her mum. My question is what process, legal wise, do I need to follow to enable this to happen as my ex wife has made if perfectly clear that she will not play ball in regards to our daughters happiness. All I want is for my girl to be happy and feel loved.
Thanks in advance for your replies
Hi,
I am no expert in this but as far as i am aware your daughter is at the age where the courts will listen to what she wants and i really dont think the court will intervene or stop her living with you. The court wont grant you full custody as that will be pointless but if she wants to live with you and there are no safeguarding concerns i dont think the court will do anything to stop it happening. Social services may get involved etc but as i said im not an expert and admin may be able to help you out more.
I hope that helps
Paul
Unhappiness is a bit vague.
Your daughter is old enough to have significant weight placed on her wishes and feelings, but it's not an open and shut case by any means. Relationships between mothers and daughters in teen years are troublesome, and "opting out" isn't always in the child's best interests.
Assuming you've supported your daughter in resolving issues with mum without success, next step would be mediation.
If mediation is unsuccessful then you would need to apply to court for your daughter to come and live with you. A decision would then be made based in part on the child's wishes and feelings but also on the other aspects of the welfare checklist.
If you are named on the birth certificate then you have parental responsibility, which means equal rights as far as having your child live with you... you don't have to go into detail about your daughters unhappiness and what that means for her.
Obviously, it's always best to try and reach agreement with the mother, but if this isn't possible there are options....stepmum has outlined one, but depending on how distressed your daughter is, if it's reached a point which is untenable for your daughter she could refuse to return to her mothers, in which case the mother has the option of accepting it, or applying to the court to have her returned. As stepmum points out, it's not a done deal, but at your daughters age, her wishes would carry a lot of weight and it's likely the court would agree to her staying with you.
Have you spoken to the school about the situation, it would be important to find out if this is having a detrimental effect on your daughter, she is coming up to an important period in her education and she does need to be settled to get the best results for her future.
