Dad dot info
DAD.info form. Ask questions, get answers
Notifications
Clear all

Free online course for separated parents. Click here

[Solved] Just got back from non-molestation hearing...

Page 3 / 4
 
jabilm60
(@jabilm60)
Active Member Registered

by the way I realised the therapy my ex is getting my son to go through seems to be via CAMHS. don't know if anyone has heard of them? seems to be that any parent can refer their children to go on there. I cant think of any reason why she would refer our son to this apart from making her case stronger. I have video footage of my son on the day he went all ok, asking about me, obviously not knowing he wont see me for this long and certainly not really knowing what's going on. Heart breaking she would use our children to do this, ive always been a fully hands on father. i suppose i will have to see what her reports from CAMHS brings.

https://youngminds.org.uk/find-help/your-guide-to-support/guide-to-camhs/#how-do-i-get-help-from-camhs

ReplyQuote
Posted : 27/05/2021 6:01 pm
warwickshire1
(@warwickshire1)
Honorable Member Registered

Its unlikely anything will arise from the reports other than the usual obvious stuff thats in them. Judge does act on err of caution though until he has seen report now . This is a delay tactic from your ex to frustrate and prolong u not seeing son. Once he reads report you probably start off with supervised contact as not seen son for a year unless your ex has an unlikely change of heart at next hearing

ReplyQuote
Posted : 28/05/2021 9:18 am

Yoda
 Yoda
(@yoda)
Famed Member

CAMHS is Children and young people's mental health services run by NHS. It's my understanding that you can only get seen by CAMHS via referral from a GP, school or Children's Services. 

It would seem like your ex is grasping it straws bringing this up so late in the proceedings. 

Hopefully, the judge will be able to make balanced decisions once the proceedings continue. It does sound like they have a grasp on it already. 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 31/05/2021 9:49 am
jabilm60
(@jabilm60)
Active Member Registered

@yoda @warwickshire1 thanks for your comments, appreciate it. I have no doubt that my ex is and will be coaching my son. this is my biggest fear, that she makes him say things which is not true, specially as i have had no contact with him for over a year. so i suppose im worried about the report that will come from CAMHS. and also CAFCAS i think will do a section 7 report too, so not sure what will come of that specially if she coaches him. everyday has become a massive struggle.  

ReplyQuote
Posted : 02/06/2021 2:31 pm

how contact centres work

jabilm60
(@jabilm60)
Active Member Registered

@Daddyup and @yoda @craigmcd & everyone have any of you had experience with CAMHS? and CAFCAS section 7 report. As you guys see from the post above, just bit worried what the CAMHS therapy report will say as I have no doubt my EX has been coaching my son. Thanks for all the help!

ReplyQuote
Posted : 07/06/2021 5:50 pm
Bill337
(@bill337)
Famed Member

Hi,

try not to worry. When I was going through courts, I saw part about CAMHS being mentioned, trying to imply that I have somehow caused children to suffer mentally. nothing came of it. I have had 2 section 7 reports done so far. They will interview you at some point. And also talk to your children. So if they are being coached, Cafcass will see and hear for themselves. I would recommend you go onto cafcass site and complete their parenting plan. will show that your child-focused and serious about co-parenting. mention it in your interview. For interview, keep it child-focused and avoid targeting your ex. be clear about what kind of child arrangements your seeking. I gave Cafcass my position statement, to help them know what I was asking for.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 07/06/2021 10:50 pm

top tips to support your child after breakup

jabilm60
(@jabilm60)
Active Member Registered

@bill337 Thanks for your reply. Im hoping CAFCASS will be able to help as I'm certain my son is getting coached by my ex and her family so I hope they can notice it in his answers. The difficult thing it I haven't seen my children in over a year and im sure they are getting coached throughout. The court has given my ex to get a report from CAMHS, school and GP to show what difficulty or therapy his had. Again like i said above she only pulled this out on the 11th hour. I will look at the parenting Plan, so thanks for that. I have set out my plan to courts already in regards to shared custody, but she's definitely making it harder. 

I've have appreciated everyone's help on here, so thanks. any comments and help welcomed. 

 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 10/06/2021 3:46 pm
Wiggo78
(@wiggo78)
New Member Registered

@jabilm60

Don't worry mate I am in exactly the same position as you. Nearly 1 year down the line with all the same false allegations, police, etc involved. Non-mol, occupation order, going through a divorce, finances and still awaiting an actual date nearly 3 months on for the Fact Find, it's a complete waste of money and time and is state sponsored cruelty against fathers through the family court system. Upsetting that it's coming up to Father's day and my girls won't be with me.

The only satisfying thing for me is the £70k my wife has wasted on legal fees compared to my £4k. 😉 

It's par for the course that this is the standard route all 'aggrieved' women go down with their feminist Solicitors who see them coming a mile off and see the cash signs in their eyes. Nothing like a heady mix of anxiety and cash to get these women to drag things out and cause untold damage to the children.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 11/06/2021 9:45 am

jabilm60
(@jabilm60)
Active Member Registered

@craigmcd @yoda @Daddyup @bill337 & everyone, so my Ex has submitted a school report which says my son was nervous on the first day at his new school, worried about his mum but otherwise fine, his settling in fine and made friends.

She's now stating my son hasn’t done the CAMHS therapy due to COVID there has been delays and will start this month. I've realised she been to the doctors in December 2020 and stated that my son is having sleeping, behavioural problems and they must of referred to CAMHS, this was coincidentally 1 months before our first children’s custody hearing, 7 months after the she went with my children / alleged incident.

She also got report from the local council family relationship officer also who wrote a biased account of everything allegation my ex told her. It was full of my ex said this…ect however most of allegation have been looked into at the fact finding and judge has said there’s no prove in those allegations.

One thing I realised was on the social services report she had stated I’m a good father and good with the kids never done any harm, this was within the first month of her leaving the house with my children. however, after I made the application for shared custody the statement to court she stated I had hit my son, which is completely different and a lie. The only thing in the fact finding was that judge said there was a bruise on her arm, and I could of hit her, I know I didn’t, but that’s wat he said. All other allegations were pretty much dismissed.

With father’s day coming it’s really hard and she keeps throwing curve balls. I’m currently waiting for a court date (which they adjourned for her to get the therapy reports) and the section 7 report CAFCAS. Any tips, on what I should expect in the section 7 report, what CAFCAS will ask me? I’m worried what my ex will coach my son to say things not true to CAFCAS, as I have not seen him in over a year.

Apologies about the lengthy statement, appreciate all your comments and help!

ReplyQuote
Posted : 16/06/2021 7:14 pm
Bill337
(@bill337)
Famed Member

for section 7 interview, try keep it child-focused and tell them what arrangements you think are in best interests of children. also go on cafcass site. download and complete their parenting plan. mention this in interview. this will show that your serious about co-parenting. if you have a position statement that has child arrangements you are seeking, can email that over to them.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 16/06/2021 8:34 pm

how contact centres work

Djsmith
(@djsmith)
Trusted Member Registered

@TheDaddy To jump in I've gone through this and my x the same, as well legal Aid unlimited so would have taken thousands to fight the case even if I had won she would have not paid my fees would have been in debit around 15 20 thousand if your not careful your x will do the same makes it difficult, etc.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 16/06/2021 9:37 pm
jabilm60
(@jabilm60)
Active Member Registered

@everyone. Thanks for your comments its been really helpful. I will be looking into the CAFCASS parenting plan this week, and get that ready. My Ex finally submitted medical records of my son which showed absolutely nothing out of the ordinary, it showed how we both took him to doctors whilst he was here when he wasn't feeling well etc.

It shows however that after she left with my children, she waited 7 months to go to doctors to make a story up that he hasn't been well after seeing me and her fighting and that he may need therapy, coincidently that was 2 weeks before our first child court hearing. She mentioned to the doctors that his been kicking the door and things. She waited another 3 months and called up doctors again to mention this again and ask for a therapy (again 3 weeks before the court hearing).

His current school report did not mention anything about behaviour issues. I'm still waiting for a court hearing which got completely delayed as she mentioned this and was asked to get this evidence. it seems like she can make anything up and just get away with it, and here's me I haven't had any contact for over a year. I suppose I'm praying someone catches her on the lies and I see my children soon.

Thanks again for all the recommendation and help. 

 

  

ReplyQuote
Posted : 29/06/2021 12:01 pm

top tips to support your child after breakup

Page 3 / 4

Free online course for separated parents. Click here

Share:

Pin It on Pinterest