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Hello Everyone, I am new to the website and could really do with some advise!!
I split with my ex 18months ago and we have a child together. The ex and my child live in my house that i left when we split. the house is in my name. we have been dealing with solicitors about access which was decided that i dont see my child anymore due to having to move an hour and half away and the ex refusing me access! but the problem doesnt stop here.
I pay the mortgage as this house is in my name as i have had it for nearly 10 years before i even met the ex!! I now need to sell the house due to my hours being cut at work and not being able to afford the mortgage and a roof over my own head. I am willing to pay the CSA what they have worked it out as without a problem. But the ex refuses to leave the house. i am stuck as today the solicitor basically said that she will win either way and i will end up having to also pay thousands in court fees and i will lose. I am just wondering if anyone out there has any advise with where i can go with this.
Thank you
Hi there,
Have you and your ex tried mediation? If not, then I would certainly suggest you give it a go. It will give you both a chance to sit and discuss all the issues surrounding access and hopefully come to an agreement. Living some distance away does cause difficulties but where theres a will theres a way and maybe once you're both face to face with a trained mediator to guide you both, you might jusy be able to find some resloution.
As far as the property situation is concerned, I can understand how you feel but having a roof over your childs head is important. Perhaps you could help your ex find alternative accomodation and offer to help with the move, both financially and on a practical level..., explaining that if you cant afford to continue paying the mortgage, it could be repossessed and she would then have no alternative but to find somewhere else., encourage her to take the initiative in a positive way. You could try broaching the subject during mediation perhaps.
You mention that you already have a solicitor, are you eligible for legal aid? I must say that your solicitor sounds rather negative, this can sometimes be the case, Dads are often discriminated against even by the proffessionals that should be there to help them! This has unfortunately been true for my son...he has just recently sacked his solicitor for being unsupportive!
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