Curiousity has led me to seek advise outside of a solicitors office as they merely give answers based upon the law,
Ill give my story and i would love some help in what i can do to get thigns going
basically ive been involved since birth with my daughter although been in the military at the time i spent majority of the first year of her life between my service obligations and been at home as much as possible, towards her first birthday i was taken injuried and sent home on medial discharge so i spent every moment seeing my daughter whilst i seeked new employment 2 months passed and i managed to get a good accountancy position which has since lead into senior management in the space of two years due to my dedication to the company. but i did all this whilst fighting in court to get more access to my daughter.
i was allowed to see her 2 hours a week at her mother house so i accepted so i could see her
i then seeked legal advise and applied to the court which said to attend mediations of which the mother refused, i then went direct to the court and they told her am allowed my daughter every sunday 9-6 but she most progress in 6 weeks
its been 7 months and theres been no progression, i have told her mothers mum i want proper access over night etc they said if i get her a room etc sorted then i can so i spent few thousand getting her new bedroom stuff and best things i could find that she liked.
then they find excuses to not allow her over night,
i am a proffesional so i am use to speaking a certain way, but even when i act my out of hours self or my proffesional self to them they throw it back in my face and tell me to stop interfering. i offered private health care for my daughter and i have enrolled her into an assesment for private education for when she turns 4 next year. they yet throw it in my face.
i am seeking advise on what to do as i just want to give my daughter to options i never had i really don't want to get courts involved as they will stop me seeing her whilst its happening.
they hate my family and since coming out the military i moved back home so i can save to buy without a morgage and they use this against me but my family havent done anything wrong but defend me.
my daughters mum neglects my daughter i obtained proof and gave to my solicitor who gave it to social services as they was concerned for my daughters safety. now there is specialists involved watching her but it still leaves me outside of whats happenings
i just want to know what have others done in situations like this.
Hi there
In my opinion you really should have applied for urgent new directions after the six week period was up and no progression was agreed. Seven months on and no sign of reaching agreement indicates that you will need to go back to court.
Was the order for Sunday contact between 9-6 and progression within six weeks the final order? If it was then you can apply for enforcement of the final order as progression has been refused. When applying for enforcement mediation isn't a requirement before applying to court, but as you wish to avoid this option you can instruct your solicitor to write to her to point out that she is in breach of the order and attach a schedule of increasing contact for her agreement. State that she has 14 days to respond with her agreement, or suggestions for an alternative schedule, and if none is forthcoming you will have no alternative but to apply to the court for an enforcement order that if found in your favour, could result in a fine, non paid community work, prison or transferral of residence....your solicitor should know how to word it for optimum impact.
The other alternative is to be gentler and ask your solicitor to write and suggest mediation as a means to progress contact as per the order.
I'm not legally trained but it's my feeling that your solicitor needs to be more pro active in trying to resolve this stalemate....you have an order, it isn't being adhered to and there are options available that your solictor should have discussed with you.
Hi There,
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I agree with Mojo, it sounds as though your solicitor is only stating the law, this (in some solicitors) can be because they see the pound signs of another court hearing, I think solicitors should be more focused on what is best and on how to get the best outcome.
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As already said I would maybe try either writting to your ex yourself or getting your solicitor to write in a friendly ish way asking for mediation to try and resolve the issues around extending the contact as laid out in the contact order. again this letter can have a date that it needs to be answered by, and if she refuses then you could apply to court again, I understand that you don't really want to take the option of court, but sometimes it's needed. If you do go to court, you will be able to show that you have tried to start conversations about increasing the contact and that your ex hasn't responded.
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If you end up in court, you don't need to take your solicitor as you can represent yourself, which is generally recomended as the judge will speak to you directly rather than your solicitor and will gain a better understanding of emotions ect.
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GTTS