its been a while since ive been here...
update so far...
court is doing nothing..
ive been advised to go to a seperated parents program,
the social services have met with me and my ex partner.
my ex partner still refuses to bring him to see me, so she was told to bring my son to the social services office so that they could assess me with him, for a section 7 report.
now this is the stupid thing...
shes not allowed me to see him for 3 months.. of course the first time he sees me hes not going to recognise me.. so he started crying.. and had to be taken back to his mother.. who then refused to let him go back into the room with me..
the section 7 report has now been done based on this one meeting and it has been recomended that supervised contact be arranged.
i have court tomorrow where they will present this report..
the new partner has been nothing but spitefull again...
im behind in csa payments..
this whole thing is getting to be a complete joke..
oh and her new bf gets to move in with my son and raise him as his own... this is a fare justice system we have...
Bollox.
Hi CBM
It's been a long process and I agree it's [censored], but on the positive, they are recommending supervised contact - it's a starting point again and it also protects you against any allegations your ex might want to make.
Hi CBM,
welcome back - supervised contact is better than nothing and a great place to start. How did court go ?
Are you going to attend a separated parents program? I think it would be an idea to jump through all the hoops you are being asked to. If it helps you see your son surely it can't be a bad thing? I would also suggest that you need to catch up with your csa payments if you can. Show willing and who knows what might happen. Remember your maintenance is for the good of your son.
oh and her new bf gets to move in with my son and raise him as his own
Do you know what? if your still on the scene and doing your best to be the greatest dad you can be - then it won't matter who is at home, you'll still be dad.
CBM - where have you been?
we've missed you mate.
I can only echo what BF and Actd have said.
supervised contact is a start - take what you can get. You'll need to work with SS - so do your best to do everything they want you to.
Just keep your eyes on the prize - getting to spend time with your son.
Babel is right about the maintenance - you need to try to keep up to date. It will show that you have your son's best interests at heart (which we know you do).
I know you're finding the whole thing a little frustrating but hang in there. I know that you are able to do this. You have come so far already and dealt with a lot - don't give up, dig deep and push on.
Hope court went well.
Let us know how you got on.
Gooner.
ok so at court and waiting 5 hours im called in only to find she has already left.
ive left a statement to the court saying I am unable to attend the adjourned hearing due to only working at my new job for a short time and pressure is on me taking time off.
I also mentioned in my statement I have had threats of from her but the main thing is that I want them to pass the order in my absence.
im also not happy that social services and cafcass are now saying they do not know who will pay for the contact center....
im really losing all hope but yes continue to fight this pathetic system.
csa payments are up to date now.
guess we are reaching a point where nothing is really happening.
Goonerplum yes ive already done the separated parents program.
ok so at court and waiting 5 hours im called in only to find she has already left.
ive left a statement to the court saying I am unable to attend the adjourned hearing due to only working at my new job for a short time and pressure is on me taking time off.
I also mentioned in my statement I have had threats of from her but the main thing is that I want them to pass the order in my absence.
im also not happy that social services and cafcass are now saying they do not know who will pay for the contact center....
im really losing all hope but yes continue to fight this pathetic system.
csa payments are up to date now.
guess we are reaching a point where nothing is really happening.
Hi CBM,
Welcome back - I'm really glad your still popping back and updating us.
It's great that your maintenance payments are up to date. You got a new job? Well done, mate. What's the job? come on details......
When is the new hearing due?
Gooner
Hey CBM, good to hear an update. Still maybe not all you'd hoped for (yet), but look where you were when you first came on here, and how far you've come since - that's a massive amount of progress 🙂
ok so heres the latest update!
2 court sessions and shes has failed to show up on both occasions...
a letter was sent to the court from her solicitor explaing she is now in a womens refuge.. due to her violent ex that has now been released from jail..
I have started enforcement proceedings for her cancelling the contact sessions agreed by the court and will update you guys on the next steps of the enforcement process...
im in yet another new job.. more stable more focussed on my long term goal... but i think ive made my mind up i want to see her punished for the wrong she is doing.
HAs anyone ever followed through with enforcement proceedings? what was the result?
Hi CBM
Thanks for the update - good to hear from you 🙂
I think the courts tend to be reluctant to punish the mother for breaking court orders, but it does happen and I certainly think you should be pursuing it otherwise your ex will think she can simply ignore the order with no consequence.
I'm sure others will also be on here to give more advice 🙂
Hi CBM,
im in yet another new job.. more stable more focussed on my long term goal...
That's good news. Glad to hear things are on a more stable now.
Sorry to hear that contact is still not happening.
Gooner
hi everyone..
so my new job.. im a manager of training and quality in a callcenter..
so the next court date is this friday the 5th.. i wont lie im feeling anxious angry and very confused... why someone will persist on making my life a living [censored]..
how do you guys do it.. ? why dosnt this system punish her for making a mockery of my rights?
anyway... wonder if getting a solicitor will even help... just more [censored] money for nothing...